I feel like i'm in the derek zoolander school for kids who can't read good.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
its a sex-hate relationship...no love involved
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So, I found out he was eating a jolly rancher while eating me out.. Hence the yeast infection.
I wonder if our vaginas are like "o thank god, no strangers breaking in tonight." Baahhhh sooo bad
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
Why did the fire extinguisher taste lemony?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
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