Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
I'm sorry, but you without makeup is like christmas without presents.
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
Dont forget the glove box taco bell stash i saved for drunk us.
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
We have started to decorate penises.
look in the field by the highway and see if there is a high heel there. Or some Taco Bell bags.
eating on the run again ?
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
You ask to touch his thighs ten times and called them magnificent.....need I say more
You is single now. The world is your ass buffet.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
