i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
everyone contributed. i held her hair back, he rubbed my vag... it was a team effort.
At the same time. Hot men feeding me brownies. In between rounds of sex.
Well at least he is okay. If you call the fetal position in my living room floor "okay"...
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
I forgot to pack a bra for work today...you would not believe the extremes i've had to go through in order to keep these nips from my coworkers
If my mom's not going to offer me drugs then it's really pointless for me to be here.
She said she wouldn't get out of hand. When the cops showed up she jumped off the 4ft high porch and fell into a ditch. She then buried herself because she was wearing light pants and though the light from the cops flashlights would reflect off her pants. We couldn't find her for 40 minutes.
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
I told him that he could either pay the 10 dollars for the box of condoms or I'll make him pay for the diapers.
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