I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
How do you say "get out of my apartment" in Spanish. No time to explain, just tell me.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
Well now I’m in the bathroom puking up absinthe so guess I beat myself up over it one way or the other
Randomize
