those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
I don't understand how people can have that much vomit in them
so he tried marking my clit with a sharpie so he could "find it again next time".
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
We found Kyle. He was next door yelling at the elderly couple to let him continue his golf game. No more afternoon drinking for him.
Just went trick or treating in my kitchen. Found chocolate and scotch. Happy fucking Halloween
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
What's clit gel and why is it in my wallet.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Look, his dick is so good at being a dick that it makes me see God. And I don't even believe in God.
And the last thing I remember was you in the bed with the german guy screaming "wrong hole" I laughed n passed out
i think i passed out for a few seconds while we were having sex but he didnt notice...
What do you think would be the best way to remove a baby carrot from a vagina?
there is definitely a hickey on my left nipple.
Randomize
