so that girl updated her facebook status as "had the worst night ever last night"
um, i could be wrong but i think it might've had something to do with mark drunkenly screaming about her unibrow right in front of her
Just saw my boss eat a banana in three bites.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
Can you explain my first weekend back, because there a lot of blacked out gaps and 32 friend requests i would like to know about
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
you kept looking at stripers and saying " Go to College"
Great. Woke up in Ts room wearing one sock, a glove and a beret with a sorrority chick CLEARLY out of my league. Jose Cuervo you ARE a friend of mine.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
Seriously! We need to take her a thank you note or something. She puts up with the drugs and the extremely loud sex. She deserves a thank you card.
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
Remember when we used to go to the bathroom to do drugs together? Now it's to help you with your spanx.
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I just forgot I was standing up.
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
Randomize
