): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I wish my mouth had a period so that could be my excuse on those days I don't feel like giving head
We had literally Just finished having sex when he handed me a plan B and said he lied about wearing a condom.
so id say it was a successful trip...i only got hit on by one cousin...
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
I JUST NEEDED TO TELL YOU I JUST FUCKED TWO BOYS IN THE SPAN OF LIKE THREE HOURS AND ONE OF THEM WAS MY SISTERS PROM DATE FROM HIGH SCHOOL IM LOWKEY BOTH PROUD AND ASHAMED
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