i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
She thought someone was breaking in but when I said it was me she got even angrier and threw a coffee mug at my head.
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
im drinking tequila tonight so will you babysit my bra?
This girl has a mullet weave. I missed oakland.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
DOUBLE NIPPLE PIERCINGS ARE HORRIFYING
I just had to explain to a 5 year old why I had fuzzy handcuffs hidden in a macaroni box under my bed.
Our friendship just got weirder. He snapchated me the porn he was watching.
I woke up and there is a small Irish man playing call of duty in my room. Discuss.
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
