Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
I got a black eye last night. This guy said for every 35 pounds you lose you gain an inch to your dick. I asked him how long he has been peeing sitting down.
She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
When they arrested me, they gave me a bracelet with my mugshot and info. When you get one they can be our BFF Bracelets.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
i'm scootering my little heart out so i'm not late for a weed pickup. this is the meaning of adolescence
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
We hit a deer while we were singing an acapella version of "I will always love you"
It's not ok to announce to a group of people playing beer pong that a girl put her finger in your butt last night. I now know this
Not only does DQ have s'mores shakes, sonic has a hot dog in a pretzel bun, and Wendy's has a burger in a pretzel bun. Important things are happening.
high moment I think I just reached personal nirvana
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
