put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
There is a 5-year old here fighting 'drunk monkeys'. He tried to knock a drink out of my hand with a plastic light saber...
You know you're a fat kid when you've spent half the day having a twitter conversation with Pizza Hut.
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
he has to serve us drink and appetizers in his french maid costume for the Pirates game tonight. Bring everyone.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I just want a man in my bed on a regular basis, who cuddles, and who I can also occasionally hang out with outside of my bedroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Randomize
