I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
My T9 Word has dryhumped saved but I can't even get it to figure out bbq.
I want to make a porn site called "girls with daddy issues"
The hot Japanese girl in my class just said her "favorite sexy American actor is Nick Cage." That, I can work with.
How do I invite him to our 4th of July cookout without sounding too much like "hey you were my first orgasm and I want your dick inside my while watching fireworks"
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Delete her number from his phone. He keeps slurring how he's going to get her "all sorts of pregnant".
AND BY FEELINGS I MEAN VODKA
like i literally can feel my uterus getting frustrated at me for not being pregnant.
I'd do them all but honestly I'm so high that I probably should have a chaperone.
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
*jedi mind trick* you want to go down on me
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