I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
Well I knew we were drunk when I told you it was a good idea to shit in the ocean
Times like this, when you talk openly about Tinkerbell being your spirit animal, are times when I'm allowed to question your sexuality.
There is a bottle of ciroc waiting graciously on my breakfast table. It's almost a sign for me to live up to my Russian blood.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
If its not for food we ain't going out.
LMAO. Stop. Men are such gentleman these days. I woke up with no one beside me and you got 6 cents
6 cents and no orgasm 💃🏻🎉
We are so blessed
well tomorrow I get to eat fungus and go to an abandoned city.
most people would fear that statement, but i wish to join you
What the hell kind of sad excuse for a bottom are you
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Randomize