dude facebook disabled my account because im registered under a false identity. now in order to get it back, i have to prove that it's really my name. i sent them an email and had to sign it "Cordially, Lloyd Pancakes"
he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
You cleaned out the gashes in your leg from hopping that fence with that whipped cream vodka, didnt you?
I have stripper ass cheeks all over my glasses
We won't have time to talk.. I'll be rolling you a blunt and you'll be getting naked.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
I m a li title tea p or short and sto u. T.... Here is my haaandley
C ANGT CATCH NE IM THE GIBNGER BREAS MAB
Take the weirdness of Japan and add the insanity of Florida and that's Jimmy
stop falling asleep in the bathtub. you are not a movie star, you cannot die that way.
You said too many real things and now I need to crawl back inside my protective fort of sarcasm, being an asshole, and sass
We dont have cups... so were doing shots out of bowls like puppies
I just shaved my legs via the sink as to not wake my parents up because I know I'll be having marathon sex tomorrow after my certification exam... so this is life after college.
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