Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
i could't wear that belt anymore, it was gonna make me keep shitting for the rest of the night
T-minus about 54 seconds until I am too high to speak English.
I'm jealous
My throat feels like a candle.
So Ryan had to wash the dishes. His solution: take a shower with them. I'm never eating at his house again.
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
i woke up and the dog was eating spaghetti off my chest.
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
I'm abstinent now
Oh, is this one of the times when you're serious?
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
Yeah I either headbutted a street sign while texting or I defended you two from an evil gang of nazi muggers. I was black out so I am gonna assume it was option b.
Randomize
