a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
i woke up on my kitchen floor, halfway through a text, and my mascara running... this is why i stopped drinking tequila
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its like everytime i see you, my vagina gets a heartbeat.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
HELL YEAH TIME TO KICK THE CHILDREN
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
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