So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
he couldn't find his key, so we just had sex on his parent's porch while we waited for his mom to get home.
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
I'm more impressed with the spaghetti smoothie at the present moment.
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Pierced my own nipple last night, and yes everyone did go absolutely nuts
Emergency nipple ring removal:vodka, tweezers, and vodka. Can you bring me a band-aid?
Just got offered cocaine at ihop. Stay classy America.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
YOUR VAGINA IS SO CUTE IT'S LIKE A LITTLE MACAROON
My ex boyfriend just amazon primed me a vibrator...guess I seemed stressed?
Randomize
