Dude go to the top of pikes peak right now to catch Kevin Bacon's band performing
The bacon? Yeah right. What if there's Tremors?
Him and Burt have already taken care of that. It's a once in a lifetime chance to catch the Bacon brothers live in concert. I sort of have a boner
Kelly Kapowski is pregnant and it's not Zach Morris'. I no longer believe in true love.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
I feel like letting the same guy who shot him dig the pellet out of his leg with a pocket knife was the bigger mistake
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
She had sex with a starfish painted on her face. Thank you Halloween
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
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