I wanna come home
And do what?
Kiss. Rip clothes off. Repeat.
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
he fucked my hip out of place.
He thought he was drowning because he was drinking water and intentionally holding his breath. Dear god what did you get me in to.
Oh and now he's calling me Brohammed Ali.
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
I wanna fuck that hideous moustache right off your face. get the confetti ready for the festivities
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
Does being an adult mean drunkenly signing for your tax return from a foreign country? If so, I've reached adulthood.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
Tell me not to drink and get on ladders. I think I need the reminder.. I'm clumsy enough sober.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
He adjusted my bra straps while I blew him.
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