just had an encounter with drunk people from out of state at dairy queen. they wanted to stay till march to see the high school play.
Someone in a vagina costume on campus.
I've been living off of popsicles and broth.
the lady at the gas station just thanked me for wearing clothes this time... i am so confused
I just threw up over a bridge. I didn't even know there was a bridge in this town. Vodka is like a transportation device.
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
He's the only guy without a tacky accent I've seen in this southern dump in 6 months. Bangage was inevitable.
You're such a Yankee.
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I just came so hard my hamstring felt like it was going to tear. I am also now a screamer
My dad told me I would need to be my mom's DD tonight. So, that's how my Easter weekend is going down.
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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