So i'm in mason getting an ultrasound.. and there are a bunch of hicks in here with their wild ass children and this one young mom yells at her kid "harley sit!"
You should introduce yourself as garth. As in garth brooks.
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
We're doing the donut challenge later. How many can we fit on his erect penis. Needless to say we get along well.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't believe we really went to walgreens to use their cork opener, bounced and drank a bottle of wine in a sketchy corner...
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
He woke up to me masturbating during the presidential address. Now he won't stop making jokes.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
HILY FUCK HES HERE I HAVE MONISTAT IN ME HE SUPRISED ME
Randomize