Dude, I totally just put a lit lighter to my hand for 10 seconds
How much beer did you get for it?
One ice cold coors, but those mountains lied
Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
im dressed up like a present. waiting for someone to unwrap me ;)
this is your brother
So the waitress at the Chinese Buffet totally just said "Adios" to a Hispanic couple. There's something you don't see every day.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
i dont feel like going...you don't know how much work goes into getting my whore on
Just put a sign on a baby carriage that says "all daddy wanted was a blowjob" might get fired.
Aaaaand that would be the most of my hand I've ever fit into a vagina before.
My vagina supports interfraternal relations
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
Cop came to our door looking for you. Something about sex in public and intoxication. I said you matched the description.
The bar tender had his entire hand down your asscrack.
I forgot about that. I was in MULTIPLE dimensions.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
