Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Ana's brother is visiting for the wknd. He came back to our place last night drunk to find me passed out naked it in the shower with the water still running. I was still drunk. We decided it was a good idea to have sex and sleep on the bathroom floor. Woke up this morning spooning and using my towel as a pillow.
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
We woke up, fucked, and shared a piece of my sister's first communion cake for breakfast.
And you thought you were going to hell last weekend.
So they're giving me a CT scan because I probably have a hernia. From getting a BJ from you. Really. This may be a pivotal moment in my decision to write a book about my life
As per my father's affair, married men are no longer off limits.
he was gone before i woke up. left a pee stain, phone number, note and $20 for sheets. safe to say i will not be calling.
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I have fiberglass splinters all over my hands and woke up with a sign that says PUMPKINS in my room.
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
we can fight about whose fault it is later....naked.
I just want to nap and funnel a bottle of wine in a cute dress
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Were we still high when we decided to break your leg?
Randomize
