I'm at his house. He has VELCRO shoes. I'm too desperate to leave...I may need help in thee life dept
worst experience of my life. her nipples were sick. kinda like a venn diagram
I've spent 9 hours vomitting in the fetal position... how did i stay like this for 9 months?
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
You screamed at all of us and then showed us your sack. You're like the boyfriend of my dreams.
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
you cant ever make fun of my bong's stick on moustache again. its the reason the cop let me keep it and my weed.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
I'll call it a tollerance break and either will be celebrating my new job with a bowl or will be smoking my sadness away from not getting the job. Either way.
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Randomize
