don't read that magazine bro. I came in it
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
She tased me when I walked in the door. Thought I was trying to steel her weed.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
After you tried speaking to him in whale you asked if you could see his "blow hole." That's how bad it was.
Did you really get up in the middle of a tattoo to go get Taco Bell?
I'm coming right back.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
You WHAT?!?!
Paid. A. Homeless. Guy. To. Throw. A. Drink. In. Her. Face.
I fucking love you.
Randomize
