I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
she looks like luggage that fell from a plane
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
Let's just say that watching the sunrise in a space helmet is really the only way to do it.
You expect me to find someone in two days who I feel comfortable enough with to ask them to get drunk and go play in foam with me?
I thought the cops would know I was on shrooms because I was 10ft tall.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Sex aside I am really scared about Syria...
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Now I'm having a post-sex brownie. Is this the life? I think it might be
I found more straws in my beard this morning. Please stop doing that.
I was at his place until 2am. We just sat really close an stared at each other. I think you are right. Germans must not have feelings. Not even tingly ones in their pants.
Randomize
