Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
I may or may not have just irish jigged at a bar. And broken out in a sweat from it. Not a good sign for that marathon yo.
dude why did you let me call her?!
i told you it was a bad idea and to quote you exactly, you said "no, it's a good idea..that's what people do when they love each other." you met her 15 minutes prior to that conversation...
He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
this is hardly the first time i've been told i'm dressed "too suggestively" for 7 in the morning.
You just met him on Thursday, and you've already nicknamed him Golden Penis?
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
I just want to let you know that when you try and lie about the "solid 10" you brought home last night, I've got a picture of her and about 10 reasons you should have left her at the bar starting with those martin scorsese eyebrows.
The sun and I are not on speaking terms this morning
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
You wouldn't believe how many pro-life stickers, and "show us your tits" signs there are between here and Dallas.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
Randomize
