Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
No it's ok. I made friends with the guy that always wears helmets to the bar. His name is helmet Harry
he suggested we do it doggy style cuz it was his dead dogs birthday...i had to do it
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I'm doing shots of jagger in dixi cups and making a lesson plan for my 8th grader summer school class. My life is so close to adulthood I can taste it
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
So apparently I was a completely different person lastnight, one who drinks scotch and makes out with 55 year old men who look like inspector gadget
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
We drank vodka and koolaid through a traffic cone. It got rowdy.
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Don't drink and try to take a shower. I thought I was drowning
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