I can't believe you blew on her face.
I feel that every long term relationship needs at least one big,load delivered straight between the eyes.
We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
i mean, i offered you kinky, jungle themed sex. i don't know what else you want from me
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
I convinced every single one of my cousins to bring me a glass of wine. I was the alcoholic queen and they were my subjects.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
Did you feel uncomfortable?
For a little while. Then I got really high and ate a bunch of animal crackers out of some dudes pocket while we chilled on their super comfortable couch.
I keeping finding meatballs in random places
It's very rude to dive mouth-first into someone's crotch without knowing if their wife is cool with it.
Doing a walk of shame at Wal-Mart at 3:30am because when I left at 11pm I was getting milk
She always used to joke about becoming a stripper. WHO'S FUNNY NOW?!
Randomize
