Come to the Burger King. We're waiting for you.
The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
so the guy behind me in court for my DUI hearing got a DUI on a lawnmower at 1AM...he is my new hero
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
Woke up wearing just a scarf, the holidays are definetly here
Just crushed a xanax into my chewing gum. Its gonna be a long, fucking up flight...
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you have no idea the dirty thing i want to do to your blad spot. please wear my vagina as a hat.
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Come to office depot with me I need help picking out a daily planner that will help me keep all of my casual sex dates organized.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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