Yah, I definitely wouldn't wanna be fingered with a fake arm...
i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I'll throw in a blow job for your kind ways. Or another booty call. I'm poor and not very imaginative. This is all I have to offer- the unicorn like wonders of my vagina.
Will you please bring me a line of coke at work without asking questions?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I told him he was probably the first guy to get fucked while wearing Star Wars pyjamas.
No im just getting a road beer. You got my pants?
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We just saw two bitche in pink capris jazzercising down the road. On Thanksgiving.
How'd your Tinder date go?
Well, I met his girlfriend...
Sometimes I wish I lived alone because there would be no one to judge me if I wanted to have whiskey and popcorn for breakfast.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
Bring me pizza. I'll trade you your underwear you left here for 2 slices.
Just got home from work. I'm going to change into sweats for a while before I have to wear normal pants to the party like I promised.
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