I need help removing her.
Just saw my gyno in public. Weird to see her hands outside of my vagina.
just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
Just spent a extra 20 minutes on the phone with the lady from unemployment talking about how to make the best brownies.
Walked into a liquor store bleeding. That kind of night.
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
Is it okay to mention my ambition to become a supervillian and kill all humans on a first date, or is that a second date discussion?
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
Randomize