it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
Sometimes, when I pour the powdered creamer in my coffee I like to pretend it's Colombian grade cocaine.
That's the kind of morning coffee a girl could welcome the day with.
Then all the boys were saying that they were amazed at how much i could smoke...i'm so proud of myself
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
The only way I could get him to agree to hook up with her is telling him I'd hook up with him next week.
Just finished off a roll of paper towels. Celebration blunt?
I don't understand but I'll be there in 5
in a thick russian accent she said "im not so good with english, much better with dick"
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
IM DRINK YORE HIFH WE ARE POSTERCHOLD OF AMERICA
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
Please tell me im imagining that i claimed that i was king of the ducks.
Just once, can I please come back to a room that doesn't smell like beer and cum?
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
Randomize
