Fuck. I have a girl here waiting on me in my room! I told her I was going to get a drink of water... I'm in the bathroom taking a dump... I have mudd butt bad... There's NO toilet paper!!
I am drunk raised to the nth degree. The possibility of getting sick is approaching infinity.
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I don't remember which guy I met at the bar is coming to pick me up. It will be like my birthday surprise.
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
I'm really tired of your booty call eating my fruity pebbles.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Just discovered i ordered the nhl center ice package back in september, the operator said there was a note next to the time I called, indicating I may have been intoxicated while calling (no clue why but it was noted)...meaning I was drunk...meaning ill never miss another sabres game...i love me and am beaming with self pride
True friends don't judge, they just try to have more booty calls than you do.
Somehow I got food poisoning AND alcohol poisoning in the same night. Its like everything I love is trying to kill me. I'm waiting for my tv to make its move.
Ok, stop saying "youths." You're 23.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
The neighbors in the apartment above us are at it again. The roleplay this time is cop and prostitute. I give it 30 minutes, you? Already sounds better than the last one
Randomize
