Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Is it a bad sign when i blow my nose && can smell vodka?
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
a pedometer??? no beatles?Steve jobs just took a dump in CA and it landed on my heart
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
I had a new years resolution not to be a whore anymore, but I think I'm gonna wait till 2011
Now there's vomit covered trash all over the front lawn. I feel accomplished
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I'm at the point in my life where I'm trying to get guys I've fucked to give a ride to guys I'm going to fuck.
He set two of my ex boyfriends on fire at two different bars without anyone knowing it was him or how it happened either time. He might be a fucking super hero
I mean, they were small fires and no one got hurt, but still. Awesome.
I broke out the Krispy Kreme, and am possibly having random internet sex in less than an hour. I think I got this breakup under control.
Got head at the top of a water slide over-looking the valley while wearing a sombrero and drinking a corona. Epic.
I literally have nothing else left to cut besides my drug budget; the dark days are among us
UGH I HATE BEING THIS WAY IM GOING TO GO HUG THE CACTUS YOU GOT ME
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
