I'm in the mood to be taken advantage of ;-)
every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
If people don't want my drunken phone call then TAKE YOUR FUCKING NUMER OFF OF FACEBOOK, like it's just that easy...
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I know my whole body feels like I belly flopped onto concrete. Seriously need to tone it down for a while
People shouldn't leave you two alone together. You're just going to end up having sex.
I knew my bag made it because I could smell the fireball that spilled inside of my suitcase before it was on the luggage carousel.
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
There's a girl passed out on the sidewalk at the parade. Its not even 10am. She gave candy to children saying it was ketchup. Still think I have a problem?
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
Im just an angry damaged little elf who wanders around and tries to find drugs.
Like he's moved to LinkedIn creeping on me since he's blocked everywhere else & I'm just so confused does he think I'm going to post daily updates of my life on FUCKING LINKEDIN
Randomize
