So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
the can pyramid on my head actually reached a decent height before I moved.
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I never thought that taking apart multiple age 5 and under puzzles would be part of my house party clean up process.
Yeah, sorry about that. I just couldn't stop.
I always have trouble explaining my life decisions to people over the age of 30.
I decided tomorrow is going to be great day wether my period likes it or not
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
Normally, it will inspire me to work. Today, it's inspiring me to masturbate.
2017 is gonna be explosive... Already watching fireworks out the window while shit my brains out. Happy Ew Year
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
A guy caught me talking to a sock today in the Laundry room if it makes you feel any better
Sadly that does. Why...where you talking to a sock
Bc I didn't know him and I asked him where he came from and why he was hanging out with my thongs
I asked you why you bought a sword and you then replied with the greek alphabet and then tried to assure me that samurais are apart of greek life.
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