The last shot i remember taking was toasted to "love, sex, and magic". Needless to say I was 0 for 3 on that toast for the night.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
I may be the first guy in history to get dome while watching An Extremely Goofy Movie.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
I had to drink heavily last night because I needed to forget that you told me you want to blow my dad.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
It's like an R Kelly music video in here. Only a matter of time before someone pisses on someone
I'm drinking wine from the cap of my laundry detergent container, wearing my bed sheet as a cape. How do you think I'm taking it?
Remind me to tell you a really funny story about me and arson.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
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