my night ended in me puking all over jenna's bed, then me trying to wash the sheets in the toilet.
If I sleep with another Spanish guy it is officially renamed my senor year.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
I was masturbating and a roofer walked past my bedroom window.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
He bedazzled a shirt for me that said "best head giver" should I be thankful for the gift or concerned that he has a bedazzler?
Are you in a position where you can bring me some nachos?
Skipping class. Wanna Drink now?
yea. just give me 15 min to write a paper.
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