3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
they said they heard you say put it in my butt
you know the rule: 3 consecutive asian hookups makes you an asian fetish guy, no exceptions
hiding in a bush to avoid a seven dollar cab ride. cabby got out a flashlight and looked for us for like an hour. help.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
MDMA, margaritas, mashed potatoes and ice cream aren't keto Kristin
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
The air taste purple.
My new gym is popular with trophy wives. They’re talking about yachts and plastic surgery
Learn their secrets! I want to meet men with Maseratis. The meat heads and Mustangs scene is getting old
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