Someone shit on the floor
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
They showed a guy on tv in a Brady jersey and a sweatpants boner when the NE offense took the field. They didn't show his face. I hope that wasn't you.
I have a completly random but serious question. Can I make a paper mache mold of you ass and turn it into a pinata filled with airplane bottles of liquor? Its for my art class
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
The straight guy here is hot. He described himself as Christian grey without the money and my vagina fell out of my body
I totally left my shirt at your house. Also I think I high fived your cactus last night
Hey you remember last Super Bowl when I sent you a pic of my testicles? Memories...
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Ethically, this is the worst thing I've ever done. Financially, however...
I was the only one in group sessions to bring up sex as a stress reliever. Some of those people were awfully judgy despite the fact we were all in a psych ward.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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