nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Soo both my 8 year old sister and fuck buddy are named Sarah..
this can't be going anywhere good
nooope. guess which one i texted last nite to come over so i could "punish her pussy"? =\
so i woke up this morning covered in mail. none of it is mine.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
Dude you have to come get or im gonna nail this 64 y/o woman as repayment for buying me shots of jager
What's up with the fire hydrant in the laundry room?
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
As I was puking, these 2 guys started peeing next to me chanting me on
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
With a butt like mine I'll never have to pay for Netflix again.
You can't give me tequila around boys who have girlfriends. That ain't new.
I went to steal condoms from your room and all I could find was chik fil a sauce
All I wanted was a good weekend full of booze, laughs, and maybe some penis. Instead, someone is in the hospital, I didn't sleep at all last night. And not because I got laid.
Randomize
