For the record dan just proved he knows the first and last names of ALL the members of NSync. Jury is no longer out on his sexuality.
I had new employee orientation at the YMCA today. I showed up with a hangover, a black eye, scratches down my arm, and a sore throat from puking gin and keystone.
the drag queen on stage looks like shes wearing the EXACT same dress i wore 2 senior prom.
You can tell alot about a person by their poo.. For example, he was a smoker.
25 Things All Men Can Definitely Agree On
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
she would only give me a road handjob because she didnt want to unbuckle
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
My coke dealer called me at midnight just to ask how to spell a word. Not sure how I should feel about that.
19 Teachers Share the Funniest Items Brought to “Show and Tell”
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
his basement wasnt heated so when i asked for a hoodie someone gave me a kimono.. i passed bc who the fuck knows where that shit has been recently
Got out of the uber to projectile vomit in the McDonald's drive thru. Gonna take a break from the Cuervo for a while.
If you gave someone an std. would you say a muffin basket, a candy gram or an edible arrangement is a better choice to send them?