youve choked your chicken with your arm asleep and acted like it was some1 else right?
About to do something stupid. You'll be my call. Bring bail money.
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
My boss just told me not to come back to work if I decide to drink. Challenge accepted.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize
