Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Beer is about to convince me to do something really stupid.
the liquor store lady asked about three times if I was sure about buying two fifths of everclear. i told her I wanted to be on cops
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
dude all you wanted to do was sleep under a bridge
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
We got back together. The pastures weren't greener on the other side, the dicks were just smaller
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Would you consider masturbating to Hocus Pocus an adulthood high or low?
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
But on a side note, how the fuck do you "accidentally " get peed on
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