You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
so i definitely just saw 2 cops high five each other as they were arresting underage drinkers in 5 points.
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
She's been drinking and was roller blading. I'm sure you can do the math
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Strangers are buying me shots and I got hit on by lesbians. How is it only tuesday
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Lindsey Lohan and I have slept with the same amount of people. The only thing she's now beating me on is rehab trips and teen choice awards, so really I'm the winner.
Bonded with the ladies at the perfume outlet by saying "help me smell like i'm not hungover before my shift starts". This is not where I wanted my life to be
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
Just told my roommate about "analvice" and she is horrified and the Sound of Music is ruined.
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Well when you come back we can have a huge bitch fit...or get really drunk....whichever comes first
Randomize
