I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
you made your cat watch a peta video with you, so you could show it how just how good its life is
We just built a bong out of a pineapple. I am never leaving hawaii. Ever.
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
you try finding a go kart track at 4 AM on Thanksgiving
FYI If I die in my sleep it is because I drank a bottle of coke from 1986. I needed a mixer
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
Yes... I'll kill two birds with one crazy ecstacy filled night.
I just woke up on an unfamiliar floor, my shoes are gone, my suits covered in red lipstick and chocolate, and Im wearing sunglasses that say "Maid of Honor".God damnit I love this country.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I'm ready to get married, then we can lie around watching anime and eating pizza while he rubs baby oil on me
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
Randomize
