Hey kate, how is it?
sloppy...it's emily. kate just tried to do a keg stand. they dropped her. we're leaving.
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
I have to verbally tell you. He looks good on paper...but he totally fails in person. Like communism.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
I'm drinking sangria out of a sand pail. I'll pass on tonight
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
You're just gonna have to make the sacrifice man.
I'm trying to hide in the table.
Drunk logic "let's go outside in front of the bar to get sick"
Drunk me started making nachos apparently but never got to the part with the cheese. There are chips everywhere
Apparently, im the only one in the world who thinks Larry King is hot.
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize
