Thanks again for letting me crash last nite. Sorry I banged your little brother.
I closed that bar. Sang every Beatles song in the book. Made Somoan friends.
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
I've had more sex in the two weeks since we broke up than I ever had in any two weeks we were together.
I just want uncharted vagina. Fresh and ripe.
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Just realized Ive had sex in or around each thing listed in Green Eggs and Ham besides the fox.
Lol what? Monday night impromptu acid drop was the alternative.
If you're going to drink sriracha straight from the bottle whilst crying, at least wear the giant sombrero for the enjoyment of your audience.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
my last search of the night was "the physics of green eggs and ham" what the fuck
Randomize
