I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
We put her face under a blacklight.....it looked like fireworks
I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
So while she was giving me a lap dance I told her I quit med school. Just so she didn't feel like the only one who's made bad decisions in their life.
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
Well then I realized I had a bigger problem when I woke up a long board.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
she was trying to use her iTranslate app while we were having sex.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
I would eat the Denny's grand slam special out of my new probation officers b hole
You grabbed my arm, said "I need you" in a very concerned voice and dragged me to the other room where you were blasting Evolution of Beyoncé.
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
If you wanna do actual business call my office. If you’re just looking to get laid you need to up your game
I think I accidentally got a sugar daddy but I was already planning on sleeping with him so I’m going to see where this goes
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