And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
Rule #1. Nothing comes between you and fantasy sports. Not even a hot chick willing to give you a blow job
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
Give me the approximate price and I'll give you the equivalence in blowjobs.
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
its not like i called off work either time for the purpose of tripping, it was more like well, i have nothing to do now today, there is acid and im only human.. but twice
btw, whatever u do, dont try and take that towel away from her..i tried, it got ugly..she said some things im sure she regrets.
I just smoked a bowl alone and took my Zyrtec here's to a full night.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Elliott peed on my floor and slept in it lol that's a one line description.
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Don't forget to bring $1s for the strippers. Make it rain!!!!
Thanks, mom, will do
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
