know what turns me on? long, stringy hair on a pasty looking girl with an overstuffed backpack and kneepads over her jeans in case she falls off her scooter
your less of a man for seeing that
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
watchout when you come home, dougs at the top of the stairs naked eating doritos
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
Lots of rum and cokes. Bartender wore my underwear on his head. Lost my keys. Accidentily started a fight. DC is going to kill me
That's because "bed time" is my sex playlist. If you're trying to fall asleep use "nap time"
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
A gentleman never tells..... therefore i will neither confirm nor deny the attatched photos
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
Well, if you're anything like me you'll get a lot of ass when you turn 30, so that's a plus
I threw up in a wendys bag in her car. when i went to throw it out the window it exploded all over me. No I don't think there will be a second date.
Randomize
