You want to go to a white party at LAX
Clubs are lame especially themed ones. Im not in a fucking episode of laguna beach
I just rolled a spliff on a dora the explorer tv tray. Preschool education meet afterschool special.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
so i never found you. but i found vodka. so its kinda the same
I had to throw up. it was the only way to avoid kissing her after she swallowed..
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
He just made my one night stand pancakes for breakfast. And I thought living with my ex was going to be weird.
Well, you were never considered a shining example of sobriety anyway
my nose is crying tears of wow.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Yo whoever left a thong on the dining room table, first of all get help second of all please remove it now
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
Randomize
